Backyard Project and April Showers

My “If you give a pig a pancake” syndrome took itself outdoors this month.  I’m not even sure what the catalyst was, but somehow, I ended up with 10 yards of topsoil, heaps of plants that I swear just jump into my cart every spring, new containers, seeds, fertilizer, and a to-do list as long as I could make it.  And when I say “I ended”, that in no way implies that is the end.  There’s still May.

I got so energized that I moved most of the 10 yards in a few days. (Dwayne was working, but he’s the one to suggest finishing up in the evenings so he could share the labor.)

 

Dwayne and Kyla did not get into a dirt dumping contest. Allegedly.

Before

During

But no after yet–it’s still growing!

The girls were putting together the trampoline, so I put Wes on the lawn mower for the first time, on the parts that weren’t reseeded.  He blogged about it. 
April has been a mild month and gave us both showers and flowers!

I planted under our mailbox trellis.

I love my “front yard”.  Let’s extrapolate that the rest of the 2 acres looks as good as this 3′ by 20′ strip.  
 

Day 51

[Note: Our school district’s first official day of Don’t Enter the Building was Thursday, March 5th, which became Day 1 on my calendar.  Wired puts it at March 11th, but that magazine probably doesn’t have kids in my neighborhood school.]

This week, my experimental parenting of “I’ll support you in whatever ways you ask for, but your teachers are giving you to-dos, and I’m trusting that you will DO them” philosophy went to shit.  Yes, shit.  So today started with me throwing Piper in the shower, taking away her jammies, setting her up at her desk and not in her bed, for period 5, the first class on Fridays.  Then, making sure she was actually Zooming at 9am, I got to see her face when she realized that she hadn’t even thought about the project assigned a week ago that was due today.  That was probably less drastic than my face when I saw she hadn’t done ANY of the assignments since approximately Day….2.   I’ve been forcing her to keep up with math and English and assumed the others she could manage.  I don’t like to be the literal motherboard that all brains under this roof must plug into, but the consequences in which Piper will supposedly learn her lesson probably won’t be obvious for several years, and the bad habits will really be ingrained by then.  What Piper learned is there is no lockdown like a Mama lockdown.



Kyla’s not doing great either.  She focused on a really cool science project and a lot of books and gardening last week and went from being ahead in math to behind.  Really behind.  You know who you can gain 10 pounds in one [ahem, really amazing!] weekend, but need at least a month to lose it?  While, keeping up with classes is just like that. This is the online algebra course done outside the school so we could, you know, travel around the world, and she could start geometry next fall.  Ironically, she will probably be the most prepared math student next year returning to class…if she catches up.  

Guess what?  This Saturday isn’t a weekend for the girls.  



Oddly, the day turned out surprisingly well.  For speech, Wes and I played a new board game.  I think the point is to say “red”, “green”, and “orange” a lot, but I’d rather just play (by “play”, I mean “win”) the game rather than have another conversation with the kid I’m around all day.  But somewhere, I got the giggles.  So when Wes somehow simultaneously tripped over the coffee table, the couch, the pillow, and his own container of pistachios “accidentally” covered in honey, I laughed.  And when he started doing his death scream over his scratched ankle, well, dear reader, I howled. I held him after I grabbed an icepack so that I could continue silent hysterics behind his back.  The girls quickly caught it too, and when I eventually pulled myself together, I found him in his room, feelings and ankle hurt, but not irrevocably. 


Piper, in lockdown on her pre-tech assignments, had finished the one due today and started working the Rube Goldberg assignment, where she made a tea-making machine for me.  It was actually great fun and led to a few rabbit trails.  First of all, we watched a few youtube videos on remarkable Rube Goldberg machines–this one most impressed me, and even more so hours later, when Piper completed her 5-step machine.

Here’s what we’re calling Take 10:



But, while we were watching a few amazing Goldberg Machines on youtube, it became lunchtime and Mama Hour, a time set aside where all 3 kids get the special wisdom across many disciplines that only such an amazing Mama can impart.  Today, we searched “coronavirus song parodies” and split our pants, busted our guts, and generally interrupted the meetings Dwayne was having on the other side of the house, laughing uproariously and we learned that, indeed, laughter is the best medicine.  We particularly liked this, that (and another one by him) and anything by this family–though this one by them pretty much made me wet my pants. Then all the kids, instead of being done by 2pm, “volunteered” to get more school work done, then we watched those same videos again, went on a “voluntary” family walk, getting home later than we should have to make dinner.  

I want to get the hang of this StayHome eventually, but I think I have to face the facts–it’s not the quarantine.  It’s me.  The good stuff and the “doh!” moments.  And I’m content (regardless of the soiled underwear).

Family Antics


So much time…together.  

Piper had to write up an example of feudalism so we taught the family to play Kings and Serfs, a card game we like to play in large groups.  When the king position is knocked out, we’ve always said, “Off with your head!” Wesley heard “Weapon!” and he was all over it.  That’s the finest plastic ax a dollar can buy.

Here, Dwayne smiles for me, thinking Piper is just photobombing. 

Which is short-sighted of him, since she pulled the ottoman over as well.
 

Kyla is oddly amused by her sister’s antics. 


Here, Wes is so glad to be reunited with Larry the Cactus II (the first one was a gift for someone else, but Wes fell fast and hard, and he got one at Easter).   Larry is a mircobead pillow, which I admit, is a wonderous thing to snuggle, and Wes has figured out a way to put it on his head.  Of course he has.


Piper has some poor speech habits which don’t help Wes’s speech impediments  particularly when she speaks on the inhale, which is even more annoying than it sounds.  So she has to do a push up for each offense.  This is good because at the beginning of the January semester, she couldn’t do a single one.  But somehow she got everyone else to do pushups with her.


Then Dwayne does some particularly amazing feats of strength!  He has worked his way up from 20 pushups daily to 30, and sometimes the kids want to give him an extra challenge.  (And, yes, my man has amazing muscle tone–I love it!)

And again, with Piper on his back.  The goal is for the kids to do pushups while being …. pushupped?  Can I makeup that word?
Hope your antics are happy, too!  We all need some laughs.

Happy Easter, from both Denise and the Evil Easter Bunny


We have hosted Easter for so many years (2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 201420162018, 2019with the exception of the year that we got a stomach bug the night before and just packed up the dinner for others, we kind of only knew one way to celebrate. After mixing our personal and religious observations with family secular traditions, we would host a dinner and egg hunts for all the family and friends we could gather to us. Every single year, it both stressed me out before and brought great pleasure during and after.  

This year was going to be different; we would be with Dwayne’s brother, Dan and his wife, Deborah, and a few crew, as we traveled up an Amazon tributary. Perhaps I would have tried to purchase chocolate bunnies for everyone in our day in Manaus before boarding, but we wouldn’t have been able to add the Evil Easter Bunny to our luggage, and I don’t think we would have found any churches accessible either by geography or language. It was going to be our own restart.

But we got another restart instead. What if it is just the 5 of us for Easter, just a third, or even fourth, of our usual? What if we still celebrated, the religious holiday, or silly traditions, and ourselves?

It was an amazing day.

I came up with a bacon, bread, and blueberry breakfast to eat while we watched the service on youtube live. Then the Evil Easter Bunny hid the bunnies with clues of where the baskets were hidden. Dwayne got to learn that we keep the extra airfilters in a box on top of the wardrobe in the mudroom. All these years, and he was unaware….much to EEB’s knowledge and amusement.

While we were still dressed up (yes, Wes considers himself well dressed in black polyester pants–because they are uncomfortable enough to be dressy, but not torturous like, gasp!, jeans–and the sweater Grandma knitted 4 or 5 years ago), we brought fresh bouquets to my aunt’s homecare and we were able to wave and shout hello from the sidewalk. Then we did the same for my parents, but got to stay much longer chatting from the lawn to the front porch. Grown ups are invariably boring, so my feral children wrestled together, much like I picture young wombats would intoxicated on spring sunshine.






I’m not going to lie–I was highly amused by their spirited hijinks.

Then the good stuff started. After Dwayne and I had a little too much fun hiding the eggs, I spread out a blanket in the grass with a good book, Dwayne dug into his favorite outdoor pastime, weeding the grass (two marijuana terms in one clause!), and the kids hunted candy. 




The kids surprised us with another egg hunt. They had found the camouflaged eggs–ones made to look like grass, rocks, etc– and filled them will little drawings and love notes and ordered us to find them.



Then we turned the tables, brought out a dose of the EEB, and hid the camo eggs so well that they were hunting them while we made (“made”, thanks Costco!) our Easter dinner. Salmon and lamb, veggies, and no deviled eggs. Since the kids don’t eat hardboiled eggs, we let our first Lent go by without dyeing eggs, and maybe I’m hardboiled myself, but I didn’t particularly miss (mess!) it.


A toast: to resurrection, to good things, and to each other.



Happy Easter, friends!

Books Read in the Last Two Months

I reported my first month’s books on February 6th.  Here’s what I’ve been reading since.  The *starred* ones I think my mother (and you) should consider reading.
**Ten Thousand Doors of January, by Alix E Harron.  I wrote to one of my favorite bibliophiles: “This is the book I will always regret not being able to write.  The snark/voice I strive for with 100 times the talent.”  This is a Story, deserving of the capital S.  Read it. [Note: Kyla agrees with me.]

*A Murderous Relation (The 5th  Veronica Speedwell, by Deanna Raybourn.  Veronica!  Stoker!  The fifth adventure. The prince of England, intrigue, and excellent verbal repartee.  The only character I look forward more to this year is Lady Charlotte Sherlock, but that is an extremely high bar. 

*Whatever You Do, Don’t Run, by Peter Allison.  Super fun read! This was recommended after we booked our Kruger National Park safari (that will get rescheduled after travel opens up again) and I shared chapters with hubby and children as they were around. I loved the sense of place, and this guy can tell a funny story! The right amount of self-depreciation, humor, interesting facts, ’round the campfire tales–I’m picking up more of this author’s books.

*Planet Earth is Blue, by Nicole Panteleakos.  Wow, this is a bit of my childhood. I was in 5th grade during the Challenger launch, and [Super]Nova is in 6th. I can’t wait to finish this story with my kids (we’ve listened to the first half), as it is an important story with no early spoilers about the launch, and it tackles full on some topics dear to me: foster children, autism, special education, siblings. It even throws in mental illness, loss, heaps of facts about space, and “mental retardation” without feeling preachy or overstuffed. There are so many things to talk about here, and the author’s note at the end adds to conversation. Very well done. The only part that brought me out of the story is the foster parents who seemed to have perfect understanding and patience for a nonverbal girl with severe autism. Wish we were all that good!

*Hey, Kiddo, by Jarrett J. Krosoczka. On a librarian-friend’s recommendation, I checked out the audio of this graphic novel, a bit of a paradox. But I’m so glad I listened to it, particularly once I head all the recording notes. A lot of love, thought, and community went into this production, but an equal amount of work went into the graphic novel, so I will now need to eye-read this book as well.

First of all, this is truly a well done memoir. Its whole title is “How I Lost my Mother, Found my Father, and Dealt with Family Addiction”. This is one I have to keep for a while from the library, because I want my kids to hear it, too. It’s a book well written for both generations. It’s probably even worth my mother reading it!


**In a Sunburned Country, by Bill Bryson.  I had first heard of this author, famous for his Walk in the Woods memoir of the Appalachian Trail, years ago but ignored urges to read it. [Note: I’m currently listening to it well walking miles a day in our neighborhood woods.  It’s dated and the author shows improved style in the five years between Walk and this newer book.]
This book made me fall in love with 1) Australia, and 2) Bill Bryson’s writing.  Our planned 3 weeks in Australia is not going to be enough, and I am already planning a second trip before our first trip is even off the ground…so to speak.  

I love Bill’s excellent research—he has read some really dry books about Down Under so that we don’t have to—and he relates it a way that is interesting, relevant, and humorous.  I can’t tell if at heart, if Bill is a historian, a journalist, a travel writer, a humorist, or just a gifted story teller. 
From Strength to Strength, by Sara Henderson.  I read this famous Australian’s memoir in conjunction with Bryson’s In a Sunburned Country, and the comparison is not flattering to this book.  This author earned her fame fairly after winning the Businesswoman of the Year in 1991. After reading Bryson, it is not fair to compare her inferior, self-conscious writing style as her many talents lie elsewhere, and what she lacks in talent, she makes up for it in absolute Outback strength.  She has more incredible stories to tell than Bryson, but even if they were told better, it was hard to get beyond her husband, who on a good day, was a jackass, and averaged out to be a multi-dimensional scoundrel.  It was hard to read about “oh, but I loved him”.  She gave up any control of her own life when she married, but after decades, wrested it back and came out well in a life not of her choosing. 

Here is my summary of reading these two Aussie books:  When they die, good Americans become Australians.  The bad wind up in the Northern Territory. 
I want to be a good American!
Turtles All the Way Down, by John Green.  Wow.  Green is hit or miss with me, but I always get something out of his characters.  This time, the teenage protagonist suffers, literally, from OCD, something the author also has lived and struggled with his whole life.  Mostly, it makes me truly grateful that my own headspace is a pretty fun place to be in.

Searching for Sylvie Lee, by Jean Kwok. Hmm, I’m glad I read it.  It was interesting to read the plot twists and the back and forth chronology, but the book’s aftertaste was from the characters, most who seemed real and hurting

Trickster; Native American Tales, a Graphic Collection.  Fairly interesting and a quick read.

The Home Edit: A guide to organizing and realizing your home goals,by Clea Shearer and Joanna Tep Yawn.  Slap me, friends, if I ever become this person.

The Book Charmer, by Karen Hawkins. This book was charming. I think it fell short in many ways, but I loved the idea of books being able to tell a certain gifted person what people should do, in the bossiest way possible. The book dealt gently with make-your-own families, and friends, and dementia, but in a way that never made me get lost in the story. But I will probably look up the next book when it comes out. Let’s see where this goes, shall we?

Room to Breath, by Liz Talley.  She could have had a hot affair, no harm to anyone, with a 24 year old really into her. Squandered. What’s the point of fiction, people?  Southern lady contemporary fic is not my first choice genre, but I was gladdened to see personal growth in the female characters.

Saint Anything, by Sarah Dessen. It’s fun when both Kyla (age 13 going on 35) and I (age 45) both read the same book. I was engrossed in the book, and Kyla and I had fun discussions about the characters, their dilemmas, parenting decisions, and even why the token black character was pretty one-dimensional. All said, I couldn’t stop listening to it, and when it was over, I mostly forgot about it. However, I am not the target audience, so I don’t hold that against the book.

The Broken Girls, by Simone St. James.  Another book not really appropriate for my 13 year old promiscuous reader, but that didn’t stop either of us from obsessively listening to it until it finished! It was an interesting mystery, ghost story, history lesson, and enough love story to make it interesting. I’d read this author again.

Dig, by A.S. King. Perhaps reading a deliberately surreal book in a very surreal time (COVID-19 work from home week 2) was not the best idea. Somewhere, I had read an intriguing blurb on the book and put it on hold. I will say that I kept coming back to it, and wasn’t able to not finish it. I do think that had I eye-read the book, I would have followed the different characters better than listening to the audio. And I’m glad I stuck with it through the ending. Overall, glad I read it, but I didn’t save the hold so my kids could also read it. 

Total Titles to Date: 36 (in 3 months).  Good enough.

Just a Day in this New World

The night before, we had yet another hail storm (at least one I wasn’t out walking in, this time).  We were playing Settlers, but the kids ran out to have a feral moment. 


The next morning, Art Gecko was shedding his skin, which I thought was interesting. (You have to catch him shedding it, because once it’s shluffed, he eats it.)


Wes had a Lego class before school that switched to online Zoom meetings to conclude.  On Friday, as a bonus project, Wes made a self-portrait. I thought the exercise was interesting, but I am not very good at abstract art.  Wes says he is wearing sunglasses and his hair is covering up one of his eyes.


Later, Dwayne and I went for a walk. As is the rule, we cannot do a family activity that all 3 kids want to participate in.  Wes was the full-body pouter this time.  But if you look closely, you’ll notice all the kids are wearing headphones and listening to music or a story as we walk.  This both annoys me and makes me glad that Dwayne and I can chat uninterrupted. And it gave us extra entertainment as we walked home as Wes started boogying to whatever he was listening to, oblivious to the world around him.  That kid loves to dance!

 A new tree has fallen across the path in the last week.  No bear was caught underneath. 

 Oh, Patient Kyla!  Wes loves being Wesley-sized–he can jump on anyone and just hang on like the tumor he is.  Kyla encourages this.

Marching Out

Kids and Dwayne have been working at home for all but two days of March, and we have at least another month to go.  Here’s how we wrapped up the month.


Kyla brought me more bouquets (and filled the vase she made for me last Christmas!).
a

We had a few beautiful days, and the kids noticed some great clouds.
Piper did cool art with a new friend.

Wes built a weapon holder out of scrap wood.
 

This two can get along really well when they are both being extra silly.  Here they are playing “Who wants a tiny piece of cheese?” from one of the many movies about a dog getting lost and traveling thousands of miles back home.  
 
Kyla can eat her weight in jelly and Nutella. (Couldn’t we all?)
Sometimes Piper is Very Unhappy about family walks.

We are getting to know our woods even better (I’ve even been doing 3 mile “runs”, gasp!).  Piper, this time happy to be out walking, poses with the resident black bear. 


Dwayne is up to 25 very sexy push ups daily.  Wes, wiry boy that he is, can do push ups and pull ups all day long.  (I can watch him for about half a day.)  The next step, of course, was for Wes to do push ups on top of Daddy’s push ups.
Dwayne is a saint.  A strong saint.